Title: NEW: Process of Elimination: B&E Author: mimic117 Email: mimic117@yahoo.com Rating: NC-17 to be on the safe side of bawdy Category: S,V, Mulder POV Spoilers: Possible random references to early episodes, plus the previous PoE stories. This fic picks up right where Process Of Elimination left off. Special Bulletin: The ever studly and adorable XochiLuvr has built a home for our curious little series! (I'm older - I get dibs on the bathroom.) Come visit www.surfacing.com/xl/poe/ so you can read them in the order that we say you should just because we can. Summary: A little breaking and entering is allowable when it's in a good cause -- like satisfying Mulder's curiosity. Keywords: MSR, smut, vignette, smut, series, did I mention the smut? Archive: Indubitably if you so desire. Please let me know where so I can brag to anyone who will listen. I'll do Gossamer and Ephemeral myself, thanks. Disclaimer: Sheee yeah, right! Not *even* in my dreams. Author's Notes: We appear to be writing in a forward progressing direction at this time. That doesn't mean we won't backslide in the future, but hopefully we'll stop confusing people from now on. Or not. Thanks: To XochiLuvr, who seems to be enjoying himself immensely while egging me on to higher heights of depravity. It's your turn next, Stud. Let's see what you've got. And to Cindy, for flying Wallenda beta once again. Sorry there wasn't anything new to tickle your fancy. Make sure you hide that list better than Scully did. Feedback: Is printed out, fawned over, and stroked to tatters at mimic117@yahoo.com. Visit all my stories at http://surfacing.com/mimic117/ Visit XL's fics at www.surfacing.com/xl/index.htm ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Process of Elimination: B&E by mimic117 I can't believe I'm doing this. I figure I've got about ten minutes before Scully starts to wonder why I'm not joining her in the shower. If she catches me rooting through her nightstand, she'll kick my ass, but I have to know. All our recent sexual experimentation just doesn't strike me as being very Scully. It's not that she's ever been cold in bed or anything like that. I've just always thought of her as more conservative -- not exactly a wild cat, but not inclined to be adventurous, either. If anyone had been rude enough to ask, I'd have said she was satisfied with the status quo. Yet some of the things she's come up with lately have been a bit outside my realm of expectations. I swear I saw her checking off something on a list in this drawer. I have to see what's on it so I have some idea what's in store for the future. What was that noise? Oh. Scully just turned on the shower head. Better hurry up before she comes looking for me. Yes! I knew it! Such a neat, organized little list, too. Exactly what a Scully list would look like. I've seen enough of these over the years to recognize her style. I've just never seen one on this particular subject before. Hoo boy. She always keeps me guessing. First up, positions. Positions? Damn! That's where all those funky new ideas came from. I wondered why she was suddenly encouraging me to jump her at odd moments in unusual places. Normally we run straight for the bedroom as soon as she gets the least bit stirred up. That one has a red check mark next to it. So you liked the different positions, huh? What was your favorite, I wonder? Up against the door the minute I walked in last week? Sex standing up is tricky, but definitely worth the effort. She seemed to like that one a lot. How about bent over the washing machine while it was running? I wonder if that was before or after she made the list? I don't even know how long she's had a list. But I do know which encounter was my personal favorite so far. It was last weekend when I was doing dishes. We'd had a nice dinner and just sat around at the table for a bit afterward, talking. I offered to wash up while she gathered some things together for a load of laundry. Then we were going to watch a video until it was time for bed. It was a special "sleep- over" night, being a Friday, and a chance for some quality snuggle time. I was standing at the sink, soapy water up to my elbows, when suddenly, Scully's trim little ass was grinding into my crotch as she insinuated herself under my arm to stand in front of me. I was sporting wood in seconds. "How am I supposed to do dishes if you're distracting me?" I asked, trying to appear irritated instead of turned on. I knew right away it wasn't going to work. She wiggled her ass against my hard-on and groaned. "I don't expect you to do dishes. I expect you to fuck me." I may be slow sometimes, but you don't have to tell me something like that twice. I don't think Scully ever knew what hit her. Wrapping my soapy, wet hands around her waist, I hoisted her to the side of the sink and plopped her face down on the counter. Grabbing her leggings and panties in one hand, I peeled them straight down her legs while unzipping my jeans with the other hand. Within the space of about five seconds, she was half naked, and I was watching myself plunge into her swollen cleft from behind. I couldn't hold in a growl of triumph, which she answered with a moan of pleasure. Scully braced her palms against the countertop, locking her elbows for balance. Holding her hips as steady as possible, I slammed into her again and again. I hadn't bothered to lower my pants any more than necessary, and I could see the teeth of my zipper rubbing the backs of her thighs red as my thick shaft drove in and out, slick and shiny with our combined fluids. It was an incredibly erotic sight calculated to speed things along a lot faster than I wanted them to go. I was thrilled to hear Scully's cry of release against the cupboard doors, because I was right there with her. I probably howled my orgasm right into her ear -- she was complaining about it ringing for an hour. All I remember clearly was feeling like I was shooting my bone marrow, and then flattening Scully on the counter as I collapsed. I managed to move off of her before she was smothered, but it wasn't an easy thing to do. She crawled out from underneath me while I just laid on the counter, gasping. "If I pass out from exhaustion with my head in the sink," I wheezed, "will you make sure I don't drown?" Being my Scully, she was as solicitous as always. "Of course I will, Mulder," she said. "Besides not getting any more sex this weekend, I'd have to explain to the police how a man with his limp noodle hanging out of his pants came to drown in my kitchen sink. Think of all the paper work involved." You gotta love a woman who can see the bigger picture. Shit. I just wasted a butt-load of time strolling down memory lane. I'd better just read through the rest of this list real quick before she catches me with the goods. So that's where she got the Altoids idea. Where the hell would you find this kind of information? She's got several different kinds of breath mints and cough drops written down. Maybe we'll get to try that particular little game again. I see she crossed out Pop Rocks. I wonder if that's something I could try on her instead. Sweet Jesus, look at this list! Vibrators. Uh oh. "Anal" has a little asterisk next to it. I hope that doesn't mean what I think it does. Mirror play. That could stand for a lot of different things, all of them pleasant. Massages. Oh yeah. That's a winner. Role playing? What's up with that? I hope she's not planning to dress me up in women's clothes or something. My calves look terrible in heels. Fun With Food. You and me and a can of Reddi Whip... Oh yeah, baby. I could go for that one anytime. Bondage? That better not be shorthand for S&M. Handcuffs, blindfolds, and feathers are okay, but I get beat up enough on a normal day. I don't need to be manhandled in the bedroom, too. At least she's got a question mark next to that one. And it's at the bottom of the list. Maybe I can head her off before she gets to it. And lots of question marks on the last line. Damn it. How am I supposed to keep up with a list like that? I never imagined Scully was interested in so many extreme possibilities. Does this mean I've been boring her by not being adventurous enough? What else can I find that might interest her? I hope I don't have to ask the guys for help. Maybe I'll start with the Penthouse Forum letters. At least I've got plenty of those on hand. I never would have connected Scully with a list like this. "Mulder, are you planning to get in here soon? The water's going to get cold." Oops. Time's up. "Be right there, Scully." First, let's make sure the list is replaced exactly the way it was in the drawer. There's certain advantages to being a trained investigator. Like making sure another trained investigator can't tell you were snooping. Looks like I've got some research to do. Two can play at kinky sex, Agent Scully. Let the games begin. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ THE END Author's End Notes: I now turn you over to the capable hands of XL, who has an idea or two of his own to explore. Don't say I didn't warn you ahead of time. Long-term therapy is your own responsibility. Don't come crying to me. Feedback: is worshipped and adored at mimic117@yahoo.com. Visit the entire series and lovely XL's darling graphics at www.surfacing.com/xl/poe/ Do you like what you just read? Feedback is food for famished fanficcers! Smut: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MSR-SMUT/ Non-Explicit: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MSR-Central/ Discussion: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/MSR-D/ To Post: @yahoogroups.com Unsubscribe: -unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com List owner: xochiluvr@surfacing.com Do you have a challenge - a story idea you don't want to write yourself? Post it to the discussion list! To post one anonymously, send it to the list owner; they'll be compiled and posted in a single message once a week.